Motivation and Inspiration

Cultivate the Skill That Will Set You Apart: Charisma

(ARA) – You speak well, dress professionally, have impressive experience and can clearly communicate complex information in speech and writing. But thousands of other professionals and job-seekers possess the same qualities. So what sets the movers and shakers apart from the masses? Could it be charisma?

Many people can’t quite put their finger on that exact quality that makes certain professionals more desirable to prospective employers and many people believe charisma simply can’t be taught.

Not so, says Kurt Mortensen, a leading authority on persuasion, motivation and influence. It is possible for virtually anyone to develop a compelling presence. “Charisma is the ability to empower and persuade others to believe in you, trust in you and want to be influenced by you. If there is just one skill to master out of all the tools of persuasion and influence, it is charisma,” Mortensen explains. “It gives you the quickest return on your time and dramatically increases your success and income.”

It is possible to cultivate charisma, adding charm and the power to persuade to your repertoire of professional skills. Mortensen says that in order to develop charisma, you must hone 30 specific skills, traits and attributes. In his new book, “The Laws of Charisma,” Mortensen offers some advice for developing your personal charisma. Here is his insight into seven charismatic qualities and how you can develop them:

Find your passion
“Passion is critical to influencing others and transmitting charisma,” Mortensen says. “Charismatic people radiate heartfelt passion.” Exploring new tasks, topics and social or professional interactions will help you discover what you’re passionate about – and what doesn’t move you. Educating yourself about a particular topic, task or issue is a great way to increase your passion for it.

Know your purpose
When you find your purpose, your life will be easier and more enjoyable, Mortensen says. Ask yourself: “What is my destiny? Where do my interests, gifts and talents lie? What is my mission in life?” People with a purpose ooze charisma and naturally draw others to them. Their purpose inspires others.

Live with integrity
Integrity is consistency between your professed values and your actions. To enhance your charisma and influence others, you must radiate integrity. What do you really believe in? And what are you willing to stand up for?

Tap your creativity
Creativity is the ability to solve a problem by combining old ideas, new ideas and imagination. Tapping your creativity, or inspiring those around you to feel more creative, opens the door to new solutions – and enhances your charisma.

Establish focus
The ability to control impulses, resist distraction and stay focused on the task at hand is an integral element of success. You cannot influence others if you can’t stay focused. Ask yourself: What is the best use of my time right now? Am I wasting time on unimportant things? Do I confuse being busy with getting things done? Am I clear about exactly what I need to achieve?

Listen
“Listening and understanding enhance charisma,” Mortensen writes in “The Laws of Charisma.” When you listen well, you discover everything you need to know to help, change or influence, inspire, motivate and gain trust. “People feel more respected and valued when you listen to what they have to say,” he writes.

Motivate
Charismatic people not only motivate others, they help others motivate themselves, aiding them in visualizing goals and inspiring them to feel they can achieve those goals. Helping others self-motivate allows them to solve their own challenges and make their own decisions, while still feeling part of a larger team.

To nurture your personal charisma, you will need to practice every day, says Mortensen, whose new book is available now in bookstores and online. “I was once stretching in preparation for running a half marathon when I saw a T-shirt that revealed a great truth. It said, ‘The challenge is not finishing; the challenge is starting.’ Make up your mind to start the race, and you will know that you are moving toward your goal of finishing.”

Secrets of the Skinny

Nov 19th, 2010

by Marilyn.

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I’ve been very impressed with The Doctor Oz Show. I like his common sense approach to getting healthy and staying healthy. This morning’s show was no exception. Three women were guests on his show. They each lost over 100 pounds and kept it off. They found the “Secrets of the Skinny” that worked for them. And they’re willing to share those secrets with Doctor Oz and his audience. Here are the secrets . . .

Cravings Killers

Brown rice tortilla, lightly toasted (baked) with salsa or parmesan

Easy Homemade Ranch Dressing with non-fat milk and non-fat yogurt

Chicken Nuggets made with flaxseed and wheat germ

Metabolism Boosters

Cayenne pepper, sprinkle on food or supplements
Vitamin B Complex
Cinnamon, 1/2 teaspoon a day.

Must Have Meals

Ground Turkey Casserole
Brownies made with black beans
Pizza made with cooked cauliflower crust

Weight Loss Secret Weapons

Learn to grade food.

          A = Fresh green beans out of the garden
          B = Frozen beans changed a little
          C = Canned green beans cooked – A little altered
          D = Processed
          F = Grandma’s green bean casserole

Use cans of food as weights. Lift weights while watching TV

Work out with a weighted vest. The more weight you have on your body, the more calories you burn.

The women had words of wisdom for the audience:

Becky’s advice: “I changed the way I looked at food. Food became nutrition.”
Cari’s advice: “Start slow and stick with it. Make plans and hold yourself accountable. Definitely have support … Have supportive people around you.”
When Doctor Oz asked what kept her motivated, Caroline answered, “There’s no such thing as the impossible.”

Becky’s Story on The Secrets of the Skinny
Cari’s Story on The Secrets of the Skinny
Caroline’s Story on The Secrets of the Skinny

What’s your Secret of the Skinny?

Marilyn Kvasnok

If I Had My Life to Live Over by Erma Bombeck

Oct 28th, 2010

by Marilyn.

3 comments

I would have gone to bed when I was sick instead of pretending the earth would go into a holding pattern if I weren’t there for the day.

I would have burned the pink candle sculpted like a rose before it melted in storage.

I would have talked less and listened more.

I would have invited friends over to dinner even if the carpet was stained, or the sofa faded.

I would have eaten the popcorn in the ‘good’ living room and worried much less about the dirt when someone wanted to light a fire in the fireplace.

I would have taken the time to listen to my grandfather ramble about his youth.

I would have shared more of the responsibility carried by my husband.

I would never have insisted the car windows be rolled up on a summer day because my hair had just been teased and sprayed.

I would have sat on the lawn with my grass stains.

I would have cried and laughed less while watching television and more while watching life.

I would never have bought anything just because it was practical, wouldn’t show soil, or was guaranteed to last a lifetime.

Instead of wishing away nine months of pregnancy, I’d have cherished every moment and realized that the wonderment growing inside me was the only chance in life to assist God in a miracle.

When my kids kissed me impetuously, I would never have said, ‘Later. Now go get washed up for dinner.’ There would have been more ‘I love you’s’ More ‘I’m sorry’s.’

But mostly, given another shot at life, I would seize every minute, look at it and really see it … live it and never give it back. STOP SWEATING THE SMALL STUFF!!!

Don’t worry about who doesn’t like you, who has more, or who’s doing what.

Instead, let’s cherish the relationships we have with those who do love us.

Erma Bombeck was an American humorist. From the mid 1960’s to the late 1990’s, she wrote a very popular newspaper column describing home life in the suburbs. She also published 15 books, most of which became best-sellers.

Marilyn Kvasnok

Retirement Planning

Aug 11th, 2010

by Marilyn.

2 comments

A lot of people believe that Social Security and Medicare will finance their retirement. But, Social Security was never meant to be a total retirement income. We all need to fund our own retirement. And the sooner you start, the more you’ll be able to save. If you haven’t been able to save anything from your current income, how will you be able to live on less when you retire? Here are some ideas to jump start your retirement nest egg.

Stop Spending
When you’ve dug yourself into a hole, the first thing to do is stop digging! Think about your purchases and only spend what’s truly necessary. No, a Starbucks latte is NOT necessary.

Make a Budget and Stick to it
Do you really know how much you spend? It’s easy to see the rent/mortgage, utilities and car payment. But, what about the impulse spending? Keep track of every penny you spend for a month. Sort it into categories. At the end of the month, you’ll have a true picture of what you really spend. Now, add all the other expenses that occur throughout the year: Real estate tax, car insurance, homeowner’s insurance, AAA, Costco membership, credit card interest, etc. Next, the trick is to make your expenses total less than your income. The difference can be saved for retirement.

Pay Yourself First
Once your budget is under control, choose a savings vehicle. I like The Vanguard Group mutual funds. If you can’t meet the minimum contribution, start with a savings account at a bank or savings and loan. The idea is to get the money out of your hands and put it where it will earn income, even if it’s minimal to start. Set up an automatic monthly transfer from your checking to the savings account. One goal would be to live on 90% of your income and save 10%.

Don’t think you can live on 90% of your income? The Richest Man in Babylon is a short, easy to read book, written like a fable. It has a common sense approach to saving money – No matter how much or little you make.

Roth IRA (Individual Retirement Account)
One good way to save for retirement is to open a Roth IRA. It’s funded with after tax dollars, so it grows tax free. That means you pay income tax on the money you deposit into the IRA account. When you withdraw the money, it’s all tax free because you’ve paid the tax on your contribution. You can open a Roth IRA at many financial institutions, including banks, brokerage firms and mutual fund companies like The Vanguard Group.

The alternative is to open a Traditional IRA and fund it with pre-tax dollars. It grows tax deferred, so you don’t owe tax until you withdraw the money. But, if you contribute every year and your investment grows, you’ll have to pay tax on all the money you withdraw – Not just your contributions.

Free retirement planning info and programs: Analyze Now!

Yahoo Finance, Financially Fit: A Guide to Saving Smart and Living Well

Yahoo Finance, Financially Fit: Boost Your Social Security Benefits

Social Security Administration: What You Need To Know When You Get Social Security Disability Benefits

What else can you do to plan for retirement? Comments are welcome.

Do Great Work

Jul 12th, 2010

by Marilyn.

5 comments

Everything you do falls into one of three categories:

Bad Work
Good Work
Great Work

Can you tell the difference?

I think we all need to do some of the Bad Work – The mindless, never-ending tasks that take up at least part of our day. They need to be done, so you either have to do them, not do them or hire someone to do them. Things like routine office tasks, paying the bills, vacuuming and shopping.

The Good Work is productive and rewarding. It’s getting the job done. You can spend all day – Every day – Doing Good Work. There is a sense of accomplishment in doing Good Work, but, it’s not moving you forward.

Great Work is exciting and scary. It means stepping out of your comfort zone. THIS is where you want to spend your time. It’s where the great minds work.

Here’s a fast paced video that I highly recommend watching …

Marilyn Kvasnok